Trauma

I'm coming to peace with the notion that I might be traumatized by all the crap that's been going on with me. I didn't really want to embrace the thought for several reasons, primarily because I thought it would be an insult to those people who have been through the trauma that we all recognize as such: death of a parent, surviving a life-threatening accident. I know people who have been through both.

But there isn't a trauma pie or anything. Me taking my piece doesn't take a slice from someone else. And as I learned from doing some research, it's not the event that defines trauma, but one's reaction to it.

I also thought that by using the T word, it would weaken me. I'm trying to be strong and move on, wouldn't claiming this state make me a victim?

No, that's my answer. Owning all parts of me...even the weak parts, does nothing but make me stronger.

Ex had this cockamammy idea that the absence of sadness automatically equals happiness. Worse yet, he believed that idea is a Buddhist concept. For the record, Buddhism doesn't teach one to deny one's sadness. It teaches that all emotions should be observed without judgment. That practice will transcend happiness or sadness, it will create peace. I just have to remember that I'm right and he's wrong. I may be going through a trauma, but I know my Buddhism!